Life is like a GPS. We plug in our
destination and look for the best way (or the shortest, or the fastest, or with the fewest stops – you get the idea) to get there. But we can’t find a path if we don’t know our starting point.
The end of the year is a time when many of us pause and take stock. We look back at the past year and consider where we are now and reflect upon where we
were (mentally, professional, personally) twelve months ago. One thing that we often weigh and measure is happiness. Are we happier now than we were last year at this time? If so, congratulations! If not, why not?
While it is natural to strive for more happiness, I believe we need to reframe how we view happiness; especially as we move through the period between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Eve - often the most
difficult time of year for many people.
To start, ask yourself: Are you happy in this moment?
For most people the answer is: 'Not at this moment, but I will be happy when_____'; and the blank is
filled in with people, places, or things to make us complete, to make us whole, to make us happy. Oddly, when we set these expectations, usually one of two scenarios occurs: either when (or if) we get the ‘it’ we find that 'it' is not enough and we set the bar higher – ‘more is never enough’; we look for a new ‘it’ to make us happy, and on it
goes. The second scenario is when we realize the new 'it' can’t be obtained or the price to obtain it is too high. This cycle leads to negative thoughts, feelings of discontent and unhappiness. Happiness becomes a distant, moving
target.
However, we can choose to take stock and find what is good and solid in our lives right now. We can choose to be happy in this moment. It may sound easier said than done; but we can't know if we don't try. Our present attitude
shapes so much of our day-to-day successes and failures. Try to focus on goals and thoughts which bring about growth and reframe our thinking. This practice allows us to find happiness in the moment and look ahead to healthy aspirations and goals without seeing fulfilment as some far-off goal. This small shift can change so many things.
Please,
take a deep breath, pause, and give this a try. I would love to hear what you discover (positive or negative) but I believe you may be pleasantly surprised by what you discover.
Goodbye 2022!
As we move through the holiday season, remember it is perfectly acceptable and advisable to take time for yourself after a big event. If you
are struggling with loss, grief or the increased pressures this season brings for those in recovery - taking time for yourself is incredibly important. If you need someone to talk to, please reach out to me or to someone else you can trust; I know how hard this time of year is for so many people.
But also... Do your best to enjoy the rest of 2022!
- Embrace joy wherever you can.
- Fold in mindfulness practices when possible.
- Choose to be happy in the moment.
I look forward to connecting with you in 2023.
